Alexis Stoudemire: Why She Chose Culinary School Now

TRANSCRIPT

Kirk Bachmann: Hello, everyone. My name is Kirk Bachmann, and welcome back to The Ultimate Dish! Today, we’re excited – so excited – to welcome Alexis Welch Stoudemire, entrepreneur. She’s waving right there. Entrepreneur, philanthropist, lifestyle and travel creator. And recent Escoffier graduate.

Alexis is a woman of many talents who has built an impressive career at the intersection of lifestyle, entertainment, culinary arts, and advocacy. She’s the founder of CASALEX. At CASALEX, she empowers others through mentorship and public speaking – I love that – with a thriving social media presence of nearly eighty-thousand followers or more. She’s become a trusted voice for lifestyle content, sharing everything from travel adventures to culinary creations with authenticity and style.

Most recently, Alexis graduated with high honors from Auguste Escoffier School of Culinary Arts, completing our online culinary arts diploma program while managing a busy career in entertainment, content creation, and entrepreneurship.

She’s also known to many as a cast member of the Netflix reality series, “W.A.G.s to Riches,” which follows successful women navigating their careers, families, and personal ambitions. A devoted mother of four, including three teenagers, Alexis is passionate about preparing healthy dishes and inspiring women to explore diverse cultures and cuisine.

And there she is! And I’m exhausted, Alexis, already just from the intro. Wow, wow, wow! How are you?

Alexis Stoudemire: I’m well, actually. I’m staying dry underneath my leaves here, as you can see, in sunny Miami. Well, not today. But I am doing well. I’m thriving.

Kirk Bachmann: You’re going to have to share. That looks like an amazing spot. Beautiful view, and you’ve got a little tree house canopy above you.

Alexis Stoudemire: Yes. We are in my lounge. This is my space of creativity and creation, my office. As you can see, I have a plethora of wine options you can have.

Kirk Bachmann: Yes, I’ve seen that. I see many bottles missing, too, by the way.

Alexis Stoudemire: Yes, we do have a lot of wine over here.

Kirk Bachmann: Got to have some fun. You got to have some fun.

Alexis Stoudemire: Absolutely.

Kirk Bachmann: Is that where you did a lot of your work when you were a student?

Alexis Stoudemire: I did, besides the kitchen, obviously.

Kirk Bachmann: Besides the kitchen. Yeah.

Alexis Stoudemire: The balance was definitely up here. I do my podcasting up here. I get creative. I can see out. I can be inspired while I’m up here. I just love it. I like to be above and be able to be out of touch if I need to so I can just unplug or plug in.

An Experience of Accomplishment

Kirk Bachmann: Unplug. I’m going to steal that from you. “Hey everybody, I need to unplug.” My wife won’t like that. She won’t like that. She’ll be like, “Plug in! Plug in!”

We have so much to talk about. I’ve got chills. I’m super, super excited. I first wanted to say congratulations! It’s not easy to be a student this day in age. It’s not easy to go to school, but it’s even more difficult to go to school and accomplish graduation like you did while running an empire, while being a mom to a bunch of kids, a bunch of teens. I know what that’s like. So congratulations. It takes my breath away. I’m super, super happy.

And I’m so happy that you made the trip to Denver at the end of last year at the beautiful Buell Auditorium in downtown Denver and walked across that stage. How’d that feel? How did that feel?

Alexis Stoudemire: You know, it’s an exhilarating feeling of accomplishment. First of all, when you are getting acknowledgment that you have passed your classes, that you have made it. That was the start of it. Then, you have the option of walking across the stage. You’re like, “Wait a minute. This is real. Not only do I get to be handed my credentials, but now I get to be among so many other people that were struggling with me, that were figuring this out together.” Then I saw some familiar faces of some of my classmates.

It was a beautiful experience of accomplishment and really just showing – not just myself – but my family that I had set out on a goal, that I accomplished it, and I did it. It just felt so good for my daughters to see me as a woman, for my sons to see me. Just to be like, “That’s my mother. She graduated. She did the work. We got to taste-test. We got to see her sweat.” It was just insane!

And just to be among my peers, to understand we were struggling and sacrificing together, and you’re not alone. That was another major thing, too. And, to be honest with you, what we’re doing is major. To be able to tap in and to show up with everything going on outside of our classes and trying to figure out how to shop on time, how to do our homework assignments on time: we are accountable. The fact that we had to be accountable, the fact that we had to show up, and we had to show what we’d been learning, it was just amazing to me. I was just ecstatic to just go and be there. I’m encouraging everyone to go to graduation. If you can go, just go and be loved on. Be appreciated.

I thank you as well because I remember you vividly. You’re part of this journey, too! I got my handshake. You just feel so proud to see other people, to know the struggle. We all made it. We have something in common.

Kirk Bachmann: You know what’s interesting? Thank you for the energy there and the comments. You mentioned family. So many students come from all walks of life. For many people, it’s the first time they’ve accomplished an academic achievement in front of their families. Alexis, I’ll tell you, I’ve probably presided over hundreds over the last thirty years. Every one is exciting. It’s one of the first things I tell new employees. “Graduation is on this date. When you come to graduation, everything we do will make sense. It will all make sense.” It’s just a beautiful, beautiful day.

The only thing that I haven’t done yet? My dear friend, Sylvia, sings the national anthem. I haven’t [sung] myself. One of these days, I’m going to get up there, I’m going to grab the microphone, and I’m going to serenade all of you. I just can’t believe it.

You mentioned friends. You’ve got friends out there who are also engaged with Escoffier. We talked about that a little bit earlier.

Alexis Stoudemire: It’s just beautiful, the fact that you can aspire. As you know, I’m creative content. What you see is what you get. I hone on authenticity. You can’t fake food. You can’t fake doing the work.

Tacos and Baseball

Kirk Bachmann: Can I just tell you, too? My family thinks I’m crazy, but I love social media. I love it for exactly what you’re talking about: the authentic stories that people are sharing in real time in genuine ways.

You were in Denver a little bit before, a little bit after. You showed the sights. You really enjoyed your time and shared it with us. But all of the dishes – wow! I wasn’t going to ask this. My wife was like, “Don’t ask that. You’re putting her on the spot.” But what’s on the menu today? What are you thinking about for food today?

Alexis Stoudemire: This is Taco Tuesday.

Kirk Bachmann: Taco Tuesday! I love it! Of course it is. Of course it is. Tell me about your tacos.

Alexis Stoudemire: Okay, so. It could be tacos. It could be taquitos. It could be Spanish rice. It could be whatever. Today, it’s almost clearing out the refrigerator for me. Whatever I come with it. Because I do have tortillas and chicken that is already done. I will take the taquitos. I’m thinking more like taquitos today.

Kirk Bachmann: I like it.

Alexis Stoudemire: That will be the emphasis.

Kirk Bachmann: I can catch the two o’clock flight. That might work.

What you just shared right there – and we haven’t even gotten to the questions yet! It’s too exciting. Alexis, that’s critical thinking. That’s one of the things, one of the skills that we hope and we strive for students to achieve. To be able to look in the fridge, to look in the pantry and understand what you can create. You don’t have to look at a recipe; you know exactly what you’re going to do. So that was a good answer.

If I could ask, if I could be so bold, I’m on your social media a lot. I’ve seen this little guy dressed up in a baseball uniform, and I’ve seen the two of you in front of the stadium. We’re a baseball family. I played baseball a little bit in college. My son is obsessed with it. Do we have a future MLB player in your house?

Alexis Stoudemire: Yes, we do. Class of 2031. We’re going to put that out there.

Kirk Bachmann: Yes. 2031. I’m writing it down.

Alexis Stoudemire: 2031. I have a little slugger. My youngest is Elijah.

Kirk Bachmann: Elijah.

Alexis Stoudemire: Baseball is in our family. One of my good girlfriends, [her] husband just actually, his jersey – not jersey – but he is in the Hall of Fame. He got inducted. Every little boy’s dream is to go to Cooperstown.

Kirk Bachmann: Yes, it is. I’ve seen that on your site, too. Yes. Yes.

Alexis Stoudemire: The pleasure and the blessing of going to support the Sabathia family on their journey.

Kirk Bachmann: Oh, I just got chills. I got chills. You slipped that in, but I got chills. I know where you are. I know where you are. Wow! Congratulations.

Alexis Stoudemire: It was just amazing, yes.

Kirk Bachmann: What position does Elijah like?

Alexis Stoudemire: He is center field.

Kirk Bachmann: That’s what I played. That’s what I played.

Alexis Stoudemire: all over the place.

Kirk Bachmann: I love it. I love it. My son’s first base and left field. You’ve got to play them all. Center field is just great because you’re right in the middle. Does he pitch at all? Does he like to pitch?

Alexis Stoudemire: He loves to pitch, but they need him in the center field. If there’s the line-up…

Kirk Bachmann: He’s got some wheels.

Alexis Stoudemire: Yeah, he’s the fastest on the team. I would probably say in the league.

A Thank You to the Faculty

Kirk Bachmann: Oh really!? Oh my God! No stress. No pressure. No pressure on Elijah. I love it. I love it.

I have a favor to ask. This is a complete surprise. A little bit later today, I have a very important faculty meeting. I’ll have over a hundred of the Escoffier online instructors that you have met many of. I can’t wait to tell them that we chatted today and that you graduated – high honors, by the way. High honors. I have two questions for you. Number one, what would you like me to tell the whole group about your experience? Anything! I’ll tell them anything you tell me.

Alexis Stoudemire: The main thing I would tell them is thank you. Thank you for your time. That would be number one. Obviously without them, there would be none of our creativity, and our inspiration would not be fueled. It’s very special what teachers and faculty members do. Even the administrators. Every single person that I have come across, whether it was an email, a phone call, or even interacting online, the timely fashion of getting back to us and communicating with us was superb. Superb! I was very impressed with the fact that I could talk to an instructor at any time of the day, any time of the night, and they would get back to you. I just want to tell them thank you for their time of sharing, being an instructor first of all, bringing us into their places where they cook, taking the time from their families and pouring into us and teaching us.

It’s even harder, the fact that they are online. We can log in whenever. The fact that they’re teaching and not knowing what the feedback is in real time as a teacher can be tough. Now that the student is now a teacher, too – we’ll talk about that as well – I get it now. It’s hard to share your passion with others, especially from a screen, but I felt every single instructors passion, to the point where it inspired me to show up, to be on time for class, to listen to what they have to say, and to listen to their techniques, their shortcuts, their nuances. All of that. I use that to this day. I just want to let them know. Thank you for your time. They are sparking so much joy into every plate that each of us graduates give to another person. They are part of this chain of command of inspiration and creativity. We have to feed people forever, so they’re very important. That’s what I would let them know.

When It All Comes Together

Kirk Bachmann: I will let them know today. That’s so beautiful.

My second part of that question: Was there a magical moment? Was there one magical moment that really stood out where it all kind of made sense for you? “I am where I’m supposed to be.”

Alexis Stoudemire: I would feel like the most magical moment for me was when I started balancing the two classes.

Kirk Bachmann: Oh, that’s such good feedback. Oh my God! Oh my gosh!

Alexis Stoudemire: I haven’t subtracted like this and added. It brought that back out of me, which was awesome. Which was fine. That would be the one thing.

Second would be looking forward to what I was getting ready to learn again. I loved the fact that I was in the culinary arts and operations program because not only did I learn how to cook essentially, I learned how to be front of house, back of house, sanitary. I learned how the restaurant operations in general work, from the farmers to the distributors down to the seed and the origin of so many things. That was my a-ha moment because I have been blessed to live in these amazing culinary countries and cities. I grew up in Kansas City, Missouri, so that was African-American barbecue. We smoked everything. Meats. Briskets. All these things, and those flavors. Barbecuing and all these things, and grilling, then to turn around and live in New York, which we all know, is a culinary-

Kirk Bachmann: Mecca.

Alexis Stoudemire: Mecca in its own way. I was blessed to be able to have chefs and go to these amazing restaurants and these amazing events from amazing chefs. Interacted with them as well.

And living in Israel. I got to live in the Holy Land, so I had to learn how to cook from scratch. I had to learn how to cook fresh. I had to learn how to cook what was from the land, what they grew naturally, because they don’t believe in any preservatives in Israel. I had to learn how to cook kosher. I had to learn how to cook all these different ways.

To come to culinary school and to see everything [from] your journey of life come together and be taught and know that, “Okay. That was familiar when I had that food, that barbecue from Kansas City because we were taught that.” If I didn’t know that, somebody else now, my classmate knows that there’s barbecue and there’s cattle in the Midwest because we took the class. Or the spices that might be in India because we took the World Cuisine class, and that’s different curry than it is in the Caribbean curry. Those little things.

So my magical moment was really finding out my full-circle moment of “this is where I’m supposed to be, and this is familiar. This is home. This is comfortable. This is familiar.” I was just excited for it.

I looked forward to class every day.

Kirk Bachmann: They’re going to be so excited to hear that.

Staying with that theme of making it to the finish line, what did you feel – just you, regardless of how it made your family feel – what was that moment when you knew, “That’s it. The culmination. I finished it. I’ve walked across. I’ve received my credentials, my medal, my toque. I did it.” What feelings came over you?

Alexis Stoudemire: I’m actually still processing it, to be honest with you, Chef. Because it’s not easy. It was not easy. Everyone is like, “I can cook. We can cook.” No, you can’t chef. [There’s] a difference. Cheffing is different than cooking.

Kirk Bachmann: It is. It is.

Alexis Stoudemire: No disrespect to anybody, but respectfully, I appreciate every meal more now. Every single meal, whether it is given to me by somebody, if it’s home-cooked by somebody, or if it is from a restaurant, wherever. I just took the time to receive my accomplishment of, “I am part of this elite group of people who get it. They want to inspire. They want to feed souls. They want to nourish your bodies. I’m now part of that elite club.” I’m still processing the fact that I know what everyone is sacrificing now. I understand it.

To even now take it up another level to where you’re teaching, that is just mind-blowing, too. Because you’re now teaching what you’ve learned and teaching somebody else that is going to use skills that are life skills. You guys are teaching life skills. Again, the math is horrible, but it’s necessary. I learned in pastry, if your numbers are off, you don’t have anything rising. You have no bread. You have no cake.

Kirk Bachmann: The science. Yeah.

Alexis Stoudemire: The science. It’s one thing without the other. It’s temperature control. It’s also the energy you put into your food is going to be consumed by whoever is devouring it. I’m still processing the fact that One) I set out to do a goal; Two) I accomplished it; Three) I accomplished it in a high honor way. We keep saying high honors, guys. This is a big deal. Get the high honors. You want the cord. You want the cord, walking across the state. You know you want it. I accomplished that. Finally, I feel like now the sky’s the limit because not only do you get to learn that you can now time manage, that you can organize yourself, that you can communicate what you taste and what you feel and how food makes you feel. But you get to really understand how important food is to every single person. You can’t live without food. No one can. We’re super important. That’s the process of me processing it still. Literally, people’s lives are in my hands. Literally.

A Love of Food

Kirk Bachmann: Yeah. I love how honest you are. That was not a cliché answer in any way, shape or form. That was a beautiful, though-out, passionate, emotional answer. People will appreciate that.

I’m curious, Alexis, this journey that you took. What inspired you to – with everything, all the success you’d already had in your life and your career and a beautiful family – when did you decide? “Wow! This is the time. This is it. I’m going to pursue this and I’m going to do this.” What was that moment like? Did someone else encourage you? Did you come up with this on your own? How did this happen?

Alexis Stoudemire: Honestly, I don’t know what I was thinking. Oh. You’re working full time. You have children.

Kirk Bachmann: You’re on television.

Alexis Stoudemire: Podcasting. All these opportunities. I have to do appearances. I have to show up, I have to travel. I don’t know what I was thinking, but at the same time, I was like, “But I can do this.”

It’s always started with love of food. My family background is over celebrations, we would have food. Over sadness and mourning, we would have food. Really, it was a good family memory for me, a core memory for me. And, again, having the blessing of living in these beautiful cities and having the opportunity to have chefs, to hire, to fire. To understand, my ex-husband’s a world-class athlete. Understanding diet and nutrition as well as digestion and rest and recovery. Having a foot in the wine business as well as just culinary in general, I’ve had personal chefs. I understand the different levels of culinary arts in general. I lived in [the] Meatpacking [District], not really, pun intended, but it’s crazy. That was known to ship in and ship out a lot of the meat that was in New York. As well as I was down the street from Food Network. I would literally be walking the streets of New York, running into some of our favorite chefs that we see on TV. Respectfully, I was in the radius but wasn’t appreciative of the sacrifices that came behind it.

From that inspiration, as well as my personal chef – to make this long story short –

Kirk Bachmann: It can go as long as you’d like. I’m loving every minute.

Alexis Stoudemire: My first chef, Chef Max, may he rest in peace. He’s an angel. He had passed away forty years young of a heart attack. He’s the one that I learned so much from because he was in my house. He was my personal chef, but I was all up in his business. I was like, “Show me this. Show me that.” I got to see. I was all up in there. I read the grocery list. He had to understand how to cook for not just me but for children and for a world-class athlete. That just blew my mind to see how he could adjust day-to-day. It was a blessing to have a personal chef, but it’s like going to the same restaurant every day. The fact that he could be creative and come up with something different from day to day, week to week, and just really captivated our palates, that was inspiring to me.

So when he passed, it was heart-breaking to me because we’re the same age. We’re young. He was also into the culinary arts and philanthropy, too. He was helping youth in Detroit. That spirit came upon me, and then I started seeing these advertisements. I was like, “Wait a minute! God, what are you saying to me? Is this my sign?” Then I started looking into it. And I’ll never forget my first initial call when I was just curious. They were like, “You can start next week.” I was like, “Whoa!, Whoa! I just called for some information.” I was like, “This is too easy.” When I say “too easy,” I mean too easy to get started. Everyone was overly helpful. Not only that, you’re going to get the text messages. You’re going to get the nudges. You’re going to get the whole thing. Okay, this is for you. I was like, “All right. Can I do this?”

Then I thought about time management. Can I make this happen? Then, I was like, “If anyone can do it, it’s me. Let me just try it. What’s the worst that can happen?” The worst that can happen became the best thing that could happen, that I graduated, that I finished, and I had high honors. And here we are today.

Kirk Bachmann: I love it. I love it. I’m going to say the same thing to you, Alexis, that I say to a lot of thought leaders and that is our viewers, and even me sometimes, we have these great conversations that are real time, but I never want to take for granted the work that we don’t see in this hour together. There is so much work. Your personal life. Raising your kids, running your business.

By the way, you mentioned your ex-husband. I promised someone that I work with who is a New Yorker, and an insane, obsessed Knicks fan. You’ve just got to give me a shout out to Lou Yen a shout-out from the Stoudemire family to Lou Yen. He couldn’t believe we were talking today. Could not believe it. I want to be respectful.

Alexis Stoudemire: Absolutely. No worries.

Kirk Bachmann: It’s pretty amazing. Pretty amazing.

Alexis Stoudemire: Thank you so much.

Life Lessons from Culinary School

Kirk Bachmann: So tell me, if you can, what you can, about your children, your family. Because it’s important to others who are listening. When you say, “Yes, you can start next week. You can start tomorrow. You can start the week after. We’re here for you.” But how do you think about your children who, no matter what, come first? What’s your advice to those who just can’t even imagine three kids at home, four kids at home, one kid at home, husband, dogs? How do you manage it? Is it discipline? Is it focus? Is it celebration, like you mentioned?

Alexis Stoudemire: Yes. It’s really all of the above. It is discipline. It is focus. It’s managing. The beautiful blessing about being in the culinary arts learning with a class, you do have to learn how to time manage. I had to not only shop for my children and for me, but I had to shop for school. It was time management of making sure I had all my ingredients, then the time management of setting my schedule. I have now gotten exceptionally accurate with my schedule because that’s one thing also about being a chef, you have to be organized. It is organized chaos, and it’s organized chaos in the kitchen and when you’re working with other people. And when people need you; they are dependent on you to feed them and nourish them. I had to learn that about myself.

It actually made me a better mother, to be honest with you because I learned how not to waste food.

Kirk Bachmann: I love that! Love that.

Alexis Stoudemire: That was a big deal because I was overshopping or anticipating things. I now know. I shop for maybe two to three days. Then I go back and get what I need. So I’m shopping for what I need, not what I want. It made me more conscious of that. In hindsight, you save more money because you’re not wasting food. You’re not wasting these things.

So the time management and saving money, but I also was saving time. I had more time with my children and myself because I became more efficient. Once you start getting those techniques down and the cutting – obviously, the first couple of weeks of cutting, you’re like “What am I doing? I’m tired of carrots. I’m tired of [potatoes.] These potatoes can go out the door. I don’t want to see another potato.” But that’s the basics. The knife skills. I learned patience.

Now, even the externship. To be honest with you, I was so scared of the externship because here I am, I only have my children and friends and family. They’d be like, “Not this dish, Lex.” or “Yes, this dish.” Whatever. Now, you all put us out there, and I had never been in that situation before.

Kirk Bachmann: I was so proud. I didn’t even know. I followed you. Thank you for the comments, first of all, about your family.

Alexis Stoudemire: I’ve got to keep going with them, too, but go ahead.

Kirk Bachmann: Mise en place came together for you. Mise en place, the whole concept of everything in its place.

Alexis Stoudemire: Everything in its place.

Being Real About the Kids

Kirk Bachmann: How did your children enjoy it? Were they critical of your cooking and your knife cuts?

Alexis Stoudemire: Let me be real with you. Each of them, the four of them, Ar’e is my oldest. She’s a college student right now. She’s learning. She’s my sourdough queen right now. She’s more into the project type of things. It’s the sourdough for her. She only has fresh bread. She’s learned that. She’s learned how to meal prep as well, and to not overspend. She was watching me do that. I feel like that kind of rubbed off on her. She has to pretty much feed herself, and you just can’t call Uber Eats and have them drop off some food. She can’t afford it. She’s learning how to budget.

My second oldest, Amar’e Jr. – we call him Deuce. He’s away at school, too.

Kirk Bachmann: I love that.

Alexis Stoudemire: There’s never a dull moment. He’s away, too. Right now, when he comes home, he’s like, “Mom, you know what I like.” I know what he likes. He comes to the restaurant of CASALEX and is just like, “Cook this for me.” That’s his culinary journey with me.

Assata is my third, my number three. She’s away at boarding school as well. She knows about healthy eating. She’s an athlete, so she knows about healthy eating. She knows about recovery and the nutrition that is necessary. They are teaching her that in school where she goes because it’s a sports-driven boarding school.

Kirk Bachmann: That’s great. Yeah.

Alexis Stoudemire: She knows what fuels her body. She knows what she needs and what makes her sluggish. She knows about the fried food. She knows about these things. The feedback I get from her is how the food feels to her, how it nourishes her. It’s nostalgic for her. She loves the Taco Tuesday. The fact that she’s like, “Mom, it’s just so good!” She adds that element.

Then the youngest, he is my most critical, the baseball player. Elijah. When I say the most critical because he has me now one-on-one. I’m learning to go from feeding six people to now two people, which is also tough to be honest with you.

Kirk Bachmann: Of course it is. Overshopping. Oh yeah.

Alexis Stoudemire: Yes, just all of that. He is my most critical yet crucial critique because he wants to try anything. He will try everything. The other day I did some kimchi pickled cucumbers, whatever this flavor. He wanted to try it. So he’s the one [who] his friends will be like from TikToks and all these things, “Can your mom cook this?” And he’ll ask me. I got Dubai chocolate the other day. I’m like, “Look, I’m not into chocolatiering.” But I know how to do a mold. I know how to double boil. I know how to melt the chocolate.

Kirk Bachmann: Your son, he knows what you’re capable of. He’s going to be critical. He’s going to call you out because he’s got you on a pedestal. He knows what you can do. I love that. I love that.

Alexis Stoudemire: He did dishes for dinner. I’m like, “What is going on here? Who’s this child? You have a personal chef. This is crazy!”

Kirk Bachmann: Just so you know, we follow each other on social. I’m stealing this. This is such a beautiful comment from your daughter, how the food makes her feel. We don’t think about that enough. How the food makes you feel. Food, for many people, stops the pain in their stomach and they move on, but how does food make you feel after the fact? After she runs or plays or whatever. I absolutely love that.

Speaking of the externship at Smith and Webster. And speaking of how food makes you feel, I’m a big Dwyane Wade fan. We’re both from Chicago, followed the Heat for a long, long, long time. It’s a great clip, you in the restaurant. They had just eaten. I think he was with Gabrielle Union –

Alexis Stoudemire: His wife, beautiful.

How Food Makes People Feel

Kirk Bachmann: And his wife, beautiful wife. He said something to the effect that your food was like a hug. How does that make you feel? Not just because it was Dwyane Wade and he’s a friend and all that, but anyone? If your son says to you, “Mom, this meal makes me feel like you’re hugging me,” – oh my gosh! That’s powerful. That’s really powerful.

Alexis Stoudemire: It truly is. It goes back to food making you feel certain kinds of ways: nostalgia. It’s memorable. You remember who you shared that perfect dish with or the time you were traveling with someone and you shared this unique ramen if you happened to go to Tokyo. I can go on and on and on about how food made me feel when I first tasted it for the first time. It’s this feeling of going in a cave and you find a discovery. Then when you find this discovery of this flavor or how these flavors come together and what it looks like, you really get to use all of your senses.

I was just able to really appreciate the fact that people were seeing me, that people saw my journey, and they showed up and supported me. You get to see the sacrifice and the fruits of your labor – literally – come out when your friends that don’t get to have your food go to your local restaurant every day. They get to see how you’ve collaborated with strangers that are now my people. I love all my sous chefs, everyone. I was doing expo. They threw me into expo.

Kirk Bachmann: Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness!

Alexis Stoudemire: The blessing was I was able to learn every station, but they were like, “You’re better here. Go back here.” I don’t know if I’m a mother and I command so much here at my home and business and being this personality or whatever, and my brand, all these things. I was there. The fact that people showed up for me and supported me. “We are here for part of this journey with you, Alexis. Not only do we want to celebrate this journey with you, we want to eat. And now we have this memory connected through food with you.” Now, we’re going to always talk about that one dish or that one time when they came to visit me at Smith and Webster – shout out to them – for really taking the time to groom me and to show me what it was like to be in a restaurant. But that fact that my friends showed up and posted about it. That’s the beautiful thing about where I sit in my position, the fact that I do have a beautiful Rolodex of people that show up for me. To have other people that are inspired and are also just there, just curious. That’s what food is. It’s curiosity all the time.

Kirk Bachmann: Coming back to people feeling a certain way when they have your food, whether it’s in your home or in the restaurant, but I get the sense that they feel your vibe. You want them to enjoy it. You didn’t just go through the process of putting that dish and throwing it out and moving to the next one. You literally want them to experience it and feel good and give you feedback because you care. That’s the beautiful circle. That’s not easy. Not everyone does that. That’s gorgeous.

I’m going to digress from school just for a minute to talk about your brand, and then we’ll try to bring it all back together. Just that. That’s a whole podcast. Eighty-thousand or more people following you, looking for what you’re up to, and being inspired by you. I don’t know. In today’s world where everybody’s going a million miles an hour, that kind of an engaged audience is really hard-earned. That’s not easy. Again, whatever secrets you can share – how did you start building your platform? What was the intention from the beginning? Did it grow organically, or was it very on-plan, very strategic? Whatever you can share.

Being in the Media

Alexis Stoudemire: It was very much organic. The reason why it was organic is because I literally was just using a platform and I was an Instagram user from when it first started, when it was just a picture. That’s all I knew. I was a picture person. This is what I see. This is what I ate. This is what I do. That’s where it started. Obviously, guilty by association, being married to someone with a face and a name was very helpful, as well as being around these networks of people who are also “famous” or have a name or have a following organically as well. It was really just my perspective and point of view.

The fact that it started off with just a few family members following me to now eighty-thousand people following – hi everyone that’s there – I just feel like it’s grown organically. People want authenticity. I’m unapologetic about who I am and my struggles and my thoughts. I know I’m not the first person to ever be divorced in the world. I know I’m not the last. I’m not the first to graduate culinary school. I won’t be the last. I’m a mother. I’m a woman, and I’m just human. At the end of the day, we want human interaction. We want human exchange. Everyone can gravitate to who they identify with or can relate to. I just know that whoever follows me, I want them to be inspired or relate to me in some kind of way. It’s just been organic.

Obviously with the influx of opportunities, like being on Netflix and on the show “W.A.G.s to Riches,” now everyone is getting to hear my voice and can almost feel me through the screen. That’s what I want. We can show pictures of food, but it can also be cold. There’s some beautiful plates that we can see, but we don’t know that it was sweat behind that and a wipe of a plate and the curation of an illustration right next to that in the list of people who put their hands on the flavors. All those things. I just understand who it is that I am. I also struggle. I’m also not perfect. I just wanted to make sure I was authentic on my struggles and my triumphs at the same time. I just found a creative way to show it, and it’s on Instagram.

Kirk Bachmann: Can you be more humble and genuine? I just adore you. You said something very, very important. Yes, many, many students start school. Many students – people – start businesses. Many people graduate. Many people are successful, but I just want to emphasize, too, that it’s really beautiful for you as a person to achieve something. I view every graduate in that room as an individual. They have a voice. They know where food comes from, and they know how that food makes people feel – or not feel.

I’m going to be your biggest advocate even if you’re too humble for our audience. You mentioned Netflix. You appeared on many podcasts and of course television – “W.A.G.s to Riches” – what is that experience? Again, a whole other podcast, a whole other adventure. It’s reality. Reality series are reality. It’s part of our life, and it’s part of your personal brand. Can you just tell us a little bit about how that opportunity came? Was it terrifying? Was it exciting? Was it all of the above?

Alexis Stoudemire: I always feel everything going back to my spirituality of all things happen for a reason. Timing and being at the right place at the right time. That was coming out of Covid. Everyone was just trying to get their footing, and getting back into the mundane of what life was “before Covid,” but I could never go back to that. It was like, “No, we’re not going backwards; we’re looking forward.”

It just came to me as far as the fact that it’s exciting to be able to have the opportunity and choice. It’s choice. Of course, everything new is terrifying, but at the same time, I know how to balance it and be excited about it and look forward to it. Because this is my path, and this is what is supposed to happen for me. It does boost your confidence, especially when you’re just like, “I did that.” I had this goal which I didn’t even know was a dream. Now, when you start something, you have to finish it. Now I’m not done because now I want to keep going. There’s so much food to eat and figure out and find out.

Kirk Bachmann: And prepare.

Alexis Stoudemire: You just can’t stop. It’s never-ending, which is a dope thing about culinary in general. Food is forever.

Prioritize to Avoid Burnout

Kirk Bachmann: It is. So, seemingly, is your energy! To that point, Alexis. Again, this is specifically for students, graduates, alumni – how do you maintain that creativity? How do you stay away from burning out?

Alexis Stoudemire: It’s balance. To me, I think of the recycle sign. The first priority to me is family. That’s my number one job first. If my family’s not right, I’m not right. Family first. Then second would be to fuel everything, to fuel safety, which is for the family, to fuel education for my family and myself, and my mental would be my work. That would be next. I have the fund. I have to fund passions. I have to fund travel. I have to fund to get food. I have to fund safety again.

Lastly would be my passions. All those things connected are very much re-cyclical. I can’t have one without the other. I have to have my passions, which is my rest, which is my creative side, which is being in the kitchen and coming up with recipes or palates, or taking a trip and traveling, and being inspired by others that are not in my radius. I’m forced to figure things out. I’m forced to find a footing.

That just really inspires me all the time because I realized from travel, especially from travel, to learn people’s journeys and learn their stories. Each of us are different. The commonality of all of that is we have tradition. Every single household has tradition or their favorites, things like that. And everyone has a sense of home. I am always going back to home, which is back to my family, which is the core. Then going back into my work, which is what I love to do and what I like to do. Then going into my passions are things that I want to do. It just all goes hand in hand, and it’s constant.

If one of those is out of whack, one can’t function without the other.

A New Perspective

Kirk Bachmann: Well said. Well said.

With all that said and the role that I’m increasingly seeing food play in your content, now that you’ve had formal training, are you approaching food a little bit differently – clearly, with more confidence – but also with different perspective? Coming back to the whole how it makes you feel. It’s a big part of it now, right?

Alexis Stoudemire: Absolutely. It’s huge! It’s respect. It’s respect from the seed.

Kirk Bachmann: Great word. Great word.

Alexis Stoudemire: It’s respect. I respect the seed now. When I say that, I mean that with so much gratitude because we also learn this, too; the seed is very important. From the seed you have the growers, the farmers, then the distributors. Then from the distributors, you have people who are taking the time to shop and to come up with these creative palates for us to eat. It’s a respect on all lines of communication. To now come to a place where someone is just enjoying your dish for fifteen minutes – I forget what the average time is to complete a meal – from years of the seed coming through the soil. It’s just respect for life, the life cycle.

Kirk Bachmann: I think you’re lucky if you get fifteen minutes. I know my teenagers, it’s like five minutes and it’s gone. It’s like, “How was that? I walked out of the room for five minutes!”

Alexis Stoudemire: At the end of the day, it’s respect. It’s respect for time. It’s respect for creativity. It’s respect for heart. And it’s respect for intention because we really have to be intentional. Food is amazing! We now have learned that it can be dangerous, too. We’ve got to be careful.

Kirk Bachmann: Yes. Of course.

Alexis Stoudemire: I really sanitize now. I used to hate doing the dishes. Now, I have my bucket.

Kirk Bachmann: I was just going to say, do you have your red bucket underneath the counter?

Alexis Stoudemire: See right now. I have my shopping. I have a list. I shop. I plan. Then, I clean. I’m a cleaning machine. I break down every time I cook. I can’t believe it. My mise en place, everything.

Kirk Bachmann: Mission accomplished.

Alexis Stoudemire: It stays in you. It goes to daily life, too, to supplies.

Kirk Bachmann: And other people see you doing that. You pass it along.

Alexis Stoudemire: They do. I want to show that to the world. I know I went to culinary school, but you guys have to cook at home. I can only show you something, but you can do this. You can clean out the refrigerator. You can make a friend rice with leftovers and things like that.

CASALEX

Kirk Bachmann: In the time we have left, I want to address the intersection of food, lifestyle, entrepreneurship, and of course, advocacy. I’m fascinated, as I’m sure you are, by people who find ways to blend their passions. You’re not following a traditional culinary path, but you’re using your education, your knowledge in your own unique way to run your business and the advocacy work that you do. Can you share a little bit about CASALEX and your work around philanthropy? And if you could, address how food and culinary education tie into mentorship and – an even stronger word – empowerment around the work that you do?

Alexis Stoudemire: Thank you for that. I want to start it off by saying CASALEX is basically my entity, my brand. It started off with my mentor who attended graduation. She came from L.A. to meet us in Denver.

Kirk Bachmann: No way! That’s incredible.

Alexis Stoudemire: She got to see this whole experience, too, which blew her mind. She has a doctorate. She’s had many graduations, but she was like, “Lex, this is cool.”

I was listening to her speak one time, and she was saying how she’s a founder. She was like, “So, I want to go around the room.” We were in a room with all kinds of executives and these boss women. She was like, “Raise your hands: how many of you are founders?” Only a few of them raised their hands, meaning they founded their company. They were there representing their company.

She was like, “I’m going to ask this one more time after I give you a few prompts. How many of you guys have a family?” Everyone raised their hand.

“How many of you guys have a home or a place you call home?” Everyone raised their hand.

“How many of you guys like to travel or go somewhere? You have to plan it.” Everyone raised their hand.

So she said, “Now. Are you the CEO of that household? Do you run these things? Do you organize these children? The husband, do you keep him in line? You’re a founder of your own entity and your own persona.” I was like, “Okay, that makes me feel a lot better.”

Then, obviously, because I am a face, now with Neil’s name, image, and likeness, people are curious for my story so I do get paid to travel and to speak and to curate vibes and to consult. As well as just my brand in general. It’s collaborations. It’s Alexis. It’s CASALEX, “case” meaning “home” because I am quote-unquote “a homemaker” if that’s what you want to call it. I hate that word. I call it “domestic engineer.” I call it all kinds of things. I’m the CEO of CASALEX. I run all this.

Kirk Bachmann: You’re the CEO of you.

Giving Back

Alexis Stoudemire: How this works! I was like, “Wow, that makes so much sense. I’m a founder.” And I am a founder. Now I collab.

How that tied into my passion of things is I was getting paid, so it had to go somewhere. Let’s start with that. Second of all, the fact that I like to travel. It’s a part of me to give back, whatever that is. If it’s just me showing up, I give back. If it’s just me monetarily, I can write a check, but I don’t like to do that. That is not my thing. Time is more valuable to me, so it’s me getting my hands literally dirty. I want to be in it.

It became a friendship that’s now a partnership with my good friend, Andy Stein, who is the founder of the Orphan Starfish Foundation. Shout-out to them and all those beautiful children I interact with. I became an advocate for victims of abuse and children that basically are orphans. They will stay in the system until they basically are eighteen, and then they have to figure things out.

So, I don’t want to get emotional –

Kirk Bachmann: It’s okay. I’m right there with you.

Alexis Stoudemire: It definitely pulls at me. I have now been to nine countries with Andy. We put the Wi-Fi. We have scholarships. We put the computers in these centers that are in these orphanages that are already established or these educational centers around the world. We’re over seventy-five-plus now. Using travel/culinary/advocacy and philanthropy work, now I am teaching these children in different countries how to make food. It just came organically and, as I say, very kosher. I’ve been to, out of the nine countries, I went with Andy to see these kids and just play with them, hang out with them, and vibe with them.

Now I’m being introduced as Chef Alexis Stoudemire, and she is here to teach you all how to make pasta, for example. So here I am in an orphanage, and I like to call them centers. I don’t want to put their name on there as “orphanage.” These homes and these centers, some of them have gardens. They have a kitchen. So many kids – there’s one child in every place that I’ve visited now that’s into culinary, that wants to be a chef. Or they’re young mothers, or they remember moments with a family member that they had food with. The fact that I’m able to give them a piece of home, a piece of education, and something as simple as teaching them how to make pasta with very little ingredients – I call it the one, two, three, four method so they can remember the recipe. As well as the fact that they’ll be able to teach their children one day, that they’ve remembered something, they’ve retained something, but the fact that someone is teaching them how to cook food, that’s something they’ll never forget.

And the flavors! The last country I was in was Guatemala. My love of travel, I like to eat, and then I like to explore. I like to learn, but now I’m teaching. It was with a whole bunch of boys. There were about fifteen of them. I’m teaching them how to cook pasta. They had fresh, hand-cooked pasta. We got basil from their garden, and tomatoes – the most beautiful tomatoes that I’ve ever seen – and garlic. Just very simple [ingredients], a simple meal, but when I say they loved eating what they cooked, to the point where I get messages now from the facility advisers that are just like, “Lex, they just made it again.” It’s flour, egg, oil, and a little salt.

Kirk Bachmann: And they’ll make it for the rest of their lives.

Alexis Stoudemire: They’re making it forever! Now the student is now the teacher. It’s my passion. I get to teach. I get to be a student. I get to taste, but also get to learn. I’m learning about these children, and they’re teaching me so much. It’s fun! That’s what I’ve done now.

Now, I’m blessed that the Orphan Starfish Foundation has now wanted to collaborate with Alexis Stoudemire, which is CASALEX. Now I will be teaching kids wherever these facilities that we have our computers [at]. If they have a kitchen, I will be there.

Kirk Bachmann: I love it. I love it. I’m going to connect you. We had an amazing human being graduate a couple of years ago. Her name is Bekei. She finished Escoffier, and then she opened up a very small cooking school in Lagos, Nigeria, and her goal is to teach young women how to cook. It’s nonprofit. I’m going to send you a link to what she’s doing. It’s spectacular.

Alexis Stoudemire: Please!

Kirk Bachmann: By the way, my oldest daughter, my first baby is Alexandra. I call her Alex. You are Alexis, but I hear Lex, so I’m going to start calling you Lex, because I love that. I love that. I love that.

Listen, this has been unbelievable. Unbelievable. What’s the biggest lesson learned?

Alexis Stoudemire: Wow! I would say the biggest lesson learned is to follow your heart.

Kirk Bachmann: I knew you were going to say that. I knew. And be true to yourself, right?

Alexis Stoudemire: Be true to yourself. It really is a beautiful thing to sit in the confidence of self-awareness, to really sit there and have that confidence of, “I can do this.”

I was a little intimidated before, being in the kitchen. Not anymore. I can go in a restaurant now and I say, “Hey, I’m a chef, too. I just want to know what you all got going on back here. I just want to say hi. [inaudible [00:59:16] I respect you. That’s it.” The conversation is different.

Kirk Bachmann: I just love it.

Do you watch “The Bear” at all?

Alexis Stoudemire: Of course.

Kirk Bachmann: When you told me that you got to expo, Season Four. It’s not easy. When the cousin had to go to the restaurant and learn how to expo after he cleaned the forks and spoons and all that.

Alexis Stoudemire: Does the computer. Just the fact that you are responsible for every dish that comes out.

Kirk Bachmann: Everything that’s going on. Timing. Timing.

Alexis Stoudemire: What it looks like, timing, allergies, temperature, sanitary. Everything! It was a lot of pressure, but I was like, “I do this. I’m raising four kids; what are we doing? I can do this.”

Alexis Stoudemire’s Ultimate Dish

Kirk Bachmann: Such good experience.

Speaking of dishes: the name of the show is The Ultimate Dish. Alexis – Lex – we cannot let you go until you tell us what the ultimate dish is in your world.

Alexis Stoudemire: Ooh. That’s tough.

Kirk Bachmann: It could be a memory, too. Or it could be what you’re feeding Elijah tonight.

Alexis Stoudemire: But the ultimate dish! That is so hard! Okay.

I would say this. It’s not the ultimate dish for me. It’s the ultimate dishes. I’m saying dishes because I was blessed to be able to go to Asia for thirty-three days and seven countries.

Kirk Bachmann: Wow!

Alexis Stoudemire: I took cooking lessons. I explored. And I ate my way around. I started in Thailand, ventured off to Vietnam, Philippines, and ended in Tokyo. Okay. Just a moment for Tokyo, right.

Kirk Bachmann: Chills. Yeah.

Alexis Stoudemire: With that being said, the ultimate experience for me is really eating and eating my way through tradition. It was eating my way through culture, and understanding how people are adapting to what they have and really understanding what they can work with. We are spoiled here in America. Let’s just say that.

The ultimate dish would be, for me, is hard for me to say it. But it would be really enjoying a good meal of something that was made by somebody. That’s everything. It’s made by somebody. I appreciate it. I don’t want to do fast food. I don’t want to do any of that stuff. I want to do a good meal by someone who prepared it for me and they gave me intention and love.

I apologize!

Kirk Bachmann: It’s a perfect answer. It’s a great answer. I had chills.

The thing, too, when you’re traveling around Asia for example, there are parts of the world where it’s all about technique. It’s perfect technique. Thai food is about explosive flavors and familiar flavors. Vietnamese food is yet a little bit different. To be able to experience that and be able to articulate that, like you have, it’s really special.

Can I just tell you, Alexis: I love your spirit. I love your kindness. I love your voice. I want to say congratulations for all your success. Thank you for choosing Escoffier and for giving back. I want to thank you for the amazing work. I almost started crying. The work that you’re doing around the world to help others understand where food comes from and how to take care of themselves. I feel like I’m a better person for having chatted with you today. I truly mean that.

Alexis Stoudemire: Thank you!

Kirk Bachmann: I cannot appreciate you [enough].

Alexis Stoudemire: Thank you for that, Chef.

Kirk Bachmann: I’m going to keep an eye on you. Let’s think down the road. I’d love to have you as a guest chef for students if you ever want to do that.

Alexis Stoudemire: Wow! That’s a lot of pressure.

Kirk Bachmann: No pressure! I’ll be right there. I’ll be right next to you.

Alexis Stoudemire: I would love that.

Kirk Bachmann: Keep us posted on all the good work. I want to know how baseball is going for Elijah. Be healthy and be safe.

Alexis Stoudemire: Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for your questions and your curiosity and your time as well. I appreciate that.

Kirk Bachmann: Absolutely.

Thank you for listening to the Ultimate Dish podcast, brought to you by Auguste Escoffier School of Culinary Arts. Visit escoffier.edu/podcast to find any materials mentioned during the podcast, including notes, links and other resources. And if you can, please leave us a rating on Apple or Spotify, and subscribe to support our show. This helps us reach more aspiring individuals ready to take the next step toward their dream careers. Thanks for listening.